Dealing with the Past

Dealing with cancer and post cancer repercussions can be very hard to deal with, physically and emotionally.

I've just had a recent fallout a few months ago where I learned I had torn tendons in my ankles, posterior tibial tendon dysfunction, arthritis, and could no longer do physical labor because of the poor condition of my feet. Are these cases linked to cancer? I say, who knows, but it's not the medical link that is most appalling, it's the coping with the emotions.
I've completed my chemotherapy and radiation treatments just under two years ago. I've been tryiing to move on with my life by working hard and going to college, but recently I've been having a hard time doing that. I just recently lost a job because of my physical conditions.
The stress of losing certain physical functions, the pain, and the grief of looking back on it all is enough to drive one crazy. I feel like I pick myself up only to fall back down again. It almost drove me crazy.
. .
Someone very dear to me once told me that it was through the most difficult times of her life that she found something that was so important to her, she used it as a drive to not only carry on, but to excel magnificantly and she has.

My drive is my dreams: To become an engineer, to master playing the piano, and to life a long and healthy, happy life with my girlfriend.
Now that I can see that clearly, I have all the energy to get out into the world and achieve all that is possible and more.
What is your drive?

Taking Advantage of Cancer: Scholarships

Although cancer is one of the most infamous diseases for reasons which are much too often justified, I thought I'd give a little more detail in how you can take your relationship and experiences with cancer and turn them into you can use, as strengths and tools that are unique to you.

One way to take advantage of having been affected by cancer in some way is to exploit the availability of scholarships that not everybody can apply for. I'm talking about the scholarhships that require you, or someone close to have had cancer. The requirement immensely restricts the amount of people who are going to apply for this type of scholarhsip, thus increasing your odds at success.

Relay for Life: American Cancer Society

The American Cancer Society is sponsoring a twenty four hour event to support cancer patients and survivors called the Relay for Life. Participation can be anything from volunteering, to walking on a team, to making a small ( or large ) donation. Survivors, caregivers, and participants are all honored in this walk around a track at Columbia River High School in Vancouver, Washington, United States.

There is also an opportunity to honor someone special by purchasing something called a luminaria bag. Each one is personalized with the name, photo, message or drawing in memory or honor of a friend or loved one who has been affected by cancer with a candle placed inside. At sunset, the bags are placed along the track and the candles within them are lit for an amazing, honorable display of support.

The event is held from 10 am on the 21st of July to 10 am the next day, that's a Satuday and Sunday.

I just signed up to participate as a survivor and volunteer myself. Here's a link to my page. I have a goal to raise 500 dollars for this event. Donate and we'll help patients, family, friends, and caregivers everywhere.

http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/RelayForLife/RFLFY12GW?px=26430312&pg=personal&fr_id=39196

I encourage everyone to participate, to encourage others to do so as well, and show your support for everyone who faces a struggle with cancer. Maybe find a relay in your area.
Search at, and for more information: http://www.relayforlife.org/index

Personal Entry

     I've been doing a lot of paradox thinking lately while  trying to remain optimistic and vigorous in my work and lifestyle. It's not that I'm faced with something as fantastic as cancer, but everyday I'm faced with new challenges and everyday I think of how I survived cancer and how I can thwart any obstacle if I put enough effort into it. So, I look back in revery of my history with cancer and I look at myself today. I can see the growth, the unique ambition I have. I also have a compassionate personality that I feel is exorbitant and can get me into trouble sometimes haha, but it's well worth the cause. It's taking time, but I'm beginning to see the good in the bad.

Emotions

One of the most arduous trials of having cancer is dealing with the emotions that come with it. Fortunately and unfortunately, I’ve both had and seen someone with cancer and it’s not an easy stree to cope with. There will be times when you feel up in a great mood and other times you’ll feel in the dumps. Either way, it’s important to your healing process that you control your emotions and in the end, come out stronger in the end.

To show that it isn’t easy, but you’re not alone, here’s some emotions that I dealt with and my two bit about them.

Lymphoma

     Lymphoma is a cancer that begins in the immune system cells called lymphocytes. These lymphocytes are white blood cells that travel through your body in a fluid called lymph. There are lymph nodes are over your body, with a concentration around your neck, that filter your lymph. When micro-organisms gather in lymph nodes, the nodes swell. The cancerous cells can travel from node to node through lymph, making lymphoma a fast-acting disease with a need for immediate medical attention.

Non-hodgkins is a classification of the type of white blood cell that is cancerous. Of the two, hodgkins and non-hodgkins, NHD is typically found to be more curable.


A bit on myself...

A little information

To get started, I think it's important to have a general understanding of what cancer is.
So, what is cancer?

The easiest adaptation of the definition that I’ve come to understand is that cancer is the growth of bad blood cells. Let me explain.

Your body produce blood cells that reproduce proteins using a genetic code. That code is used to produce new cells everyday and to keep your body replenished when old cells die. Now imagine a cell with a different genetic code was produced. Typically this “deformed” cell would be ebbed away by the body’s white blood cells before any duplication could occur, but suppose your immune system didn’t stop that cell from reproducing. Now you have the growth of a new cell, unlike others in your body. These new cells from a growth called a tumor that can replace and destroy healthy tissue.

Cancer symptoms vary widely based on the type of cancer.

This is true and very important to know. Not only that, but even symptoms and the severity of symptoms can vary depending on the person's body. Every body is different, right?

Intro to Speak on Cancer Blog

It's the one thing people are most afraid of, for friends, for family, for others, and for themselves. Everyone is afraid of having cancer, of any sort, but a lot of people are afraid of what they don't know, such as the experiences a person goes through when experiencing having cancer, the treatments that follow, and living life afterward as a survivor. It’s true that it’s an arduous trial to be given, but with support and the will, having cancer can be made a lot easier to handle.


I'm going to let the cat out of the bag. I was diagnosed with non-hodgkins lymphoma and T-cell leukemia just a few years back. I am now cancer free and living life just as anyone else does, with some minor complications that I don't even know if they are tied to having cancer or not. I have a girlfriend, I have a job, I go to college, I have hobbies, and most of all, I have a life. Having had cancer is a large part of my life, but it's not everything. I still have my control over the next "x" amount of years of my life, which I plan on living to the fullest.

I've created this blog to share some of the experiences I've had with cancer, to outreach to anyone who is interested in learning more about those experiences or talking about them, and to support others who are also faced with this adversity, whether it'd be a patient or family or friend of one.

I learned from my experiences, how special it was, how comforting, and how alleviating it was to have someone else to talk to and to empathize with during such trialing times. I can’t put into words how much that meant to me personally when I had someone to talk to and to always have family and support. I started to do the same for other patients and asked how it affected them. They all said something similar to what I had felt, that it had helped them through their day to day struggle to survive.

My goal with this blog is to provide what others provided for me: support, information, and just somebody to talk to.