Dealing with the Past

Dealing with cancer and post cancer repercussions can be very hard to deal with, physically and emotionally.

I've just had a recent fallout a few months ago where I learned I had torn tendons in my ankles, posterior tibial tendon dysfunction, arthritis, and could no longer do physical labor because of the poor condition of my feet. Are these cases linked to cancer? I say, who knows, but it's not the medical link that is most appalling, it's the coping with the emotions.
I've completed my chemotherapy and radiation treatments just under two years ago. I've been tryiing to move on with my life by working hard and going to college, but recently I've been having a hard time doing that. I just recently lost a job because of my physical conditions.
The stress of losing certain physical functions, the pain, and the grief of looking back on it all is enough to drive one crazy. I feel like I pick myself up only to fall back down again. It almost drove me crazy.
. .
Someone very dear to me once told me that it was through the most difficult times of her life that she found something that was so important to her, she used it as a drive to not only carry on, but to excel magnificantly and she has.

My drive is my dreams: To become an engineer, to master playing the piano, and to life a long and healthy, happy life with my girlfriend.
Now that I can see that clearly, I have all the energy to get out into the world and achieve all that is possible and more.
What is your drive?

Taking Advantage of Cancer: Scholarships

Although cancer is one of the most infamous diseases for reasons which are much too often justified, I thought I'd give a little more detail in how you can take your relationship and experiences with cancer and turn them into you can use, as strengths and tools that are unique to you.

One way to take advantage of having been affected by cancer in some way is to exploit the availability of scholarships that not everybody can apply for. I'm talking about the scholarhships that require you, or someone close to have had cancer. The requirement immensely restricts the amount of people who are going to apply for this type of scholarhsip, thus increasing your odds at success.

Relay for Life: American Cancer Society

The American Cancer Society is sponsoring a twenty four hour event to support cancer patients and survivors called the Relay for Life. Participation can be anything from volunteering, to walking on a team, to making a small ( or large ) donation. Survivors, caregivers, and participants are all honored in this walk around a track at Columbia River High School in Vancouver, Washington, United States.

There is also an opportunity to honor someone special by purchasing something called a luminaria bag. Each one is personalized with the name, photo, message or drawing in memory or honor of a friend or loved one who has been affected by cancer with a candle placed inside. At sunset, the bags are placed along the track and the candles within them are lit for an amazing, honorable display of support.

The event is held from 10 am on the 21st of July to 10 am the next day, that's a Satuday and Sunday.

I just signed up to participate as a survivor and volunteer myself. Here's a link to my page. I have a goal to raise 500 dollars for this event. Donate and we'll help patients, family, friends, and caregivers everywhere.

http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/RelayForLife/RFLFY12GW?px=26430312&pg=personal&fr_id=39196

I encourage everyone to participate, to encourage others to do so as well, and show your support for everyone who faces a struggle with cancer. Maybe find a relay in your area.
Search at, and for more information: http://www.relayforlife.org/index

Personal Entry

     I've been doing a lot of paradox thinking lately while  trying to remain optimistic and vigorous in my work and lifestyle. It's not that I'm faced with something as fantastic as cancer, but everyday I'm faced with new challenges and everyday I think of how I survived cancer and how I can thwart any obstacle if I put enough effort into it. So, I look back in revery of my history with cancer and I look at myself today. I can see the growth, the unique ambition I have. I also have a compassionate personality that I feel is exorbitant and can get me into trouble sometimes haha, but it's well worth the cause. It's taking time, but I'm beginning to see the good in the bad.